Just as we’ve settled into thinking we were going to be a bit more settled for a while, life decides to shake things up. A bit of background: N & I have spent the better part of our relationship doing some form of long distance.
Our relationship began a few months before my imminent cross-country move; we spent those first two years seeing each other infrequently, at best. When I moved back to Calgary, much of N’s work was based out of town, so he left for short periods fairly often. Then when he moved to his current company, we knew he’d be spending even more time out of town since most of their projects are on a rotation of some sort. We are no strangers to being apart.
In January, he found himself back in the Calgary office. We were preparing ourselves for an eventual out of town offer, as they don’t have as much work here right now. We’d discussed what we were willing to do, & what we weren’t, but then suddenly it seemed like he might be staying in town. You could say we were cautiously optimistic.
One Thursday a couple weeks ago, his boss approached him about moving to San Francisco. It was one of the options we’d known was a possibility, so we weren’t taken totally off guard, but we were surprised to find that it was back on the table so suddenly. We were told that with the current political situation in the States, it would take a little longer than the usual month for N to get his visa. Coupled with him needing to renew his passport, we figured we had some time. Turns out, we don’t, & he’s already preparing to leave this month.
So, here we go again with this long distance thing. N is moving down to San Francisco, (on a sort of three week rotation, keeping his Canadian salary, benefits, etc) while I stay here in Calgary. There were a lot of factors that went into this particular decision, & it’s hard to know if it’s the right one. One of the big ones was I wasn’t sure I was ready to be jobless in the US. It’s easy to imagine it would be fun to go down & freelance or blog or volunteer, but I think it’s harder to actually do it, & be without any kind of real income.
It’s certainly going to be an interesting adventure. N gets weekends off during the 3 weeks he’s down there, so he’ll get lots of time to explore the Bay Area & San Francisco. That part makes it a bit of a cool opportunity. Neither of us have ever been to the area, so we’re making plans to spend some time there together too. We’ve also got some Europe plans to look forward to. Overall, we’re optimistic that we can make the best of it & it’s only temporary. It’s a lot easier when we know it’s temporary.
Have you ever done long distance? Do you have any tips for us for living in the Bay Area? We’d love to hear them, if you do!