WHOA lansi

francophile, oenophile, logophile, turophile

Tag: Journal Day (Page 1 of 2)

#metoo

Prison

In the wake of the Harvey Weinstein allegations & this #metoo movement flooding my social media feeds, I’ve done a lot of thinking. None of it is overly original or groundbreaking, but I wanted to share a little nonetheless.

Like so many, I posted a #metoo status a couple weeks ago without elaborating on the who or the why or the what. I posted only these two simple words to my social media. I had a few reasons for this, & I wanted to talk a little bit about them.

Let me start my saying, I don’t think I or anyone else needs to shed light on any of the reasons for posting this status. In some ways, there are too many uncomfortable examples of misogyny, harassment, & worse, abuse, in every woman I know’s life. We’ve all felt threatened at some point. We’ve all had to think of a possible terrible outcome that many men are lucky to have never considered. That’s the everyday reality for women. I don’t feel that I need to highlight examples of this in my own life, & I don’t want to validate them by doing so. So I didn’t.

The bigger reason I hesitated to post anything though is that it didn’t feel bad enough. I lead a fantastic life. I’m extremely lucky & immeasurably privileged. I know many women who have suffered so much, & I don’t feel that I have. So at first, I felt silly posting anything at all. How many times have we heard that in the last few weeks? How many times have we to listened to someone downplaying the harassment they’ve faced, because “it really could be a whole lot worse”? But that’s what we do. That’s what society has honestly taught so many of us. It’s not that bad. Others have it worse. Maybe it’s even partially a coping mechanism. I don’t know.

Talking about these things and shedding light on the problem doesn’t take away from anything that’s happened to someone else. It doesn’t make it less. Truthfully, I think it raises more awareness about what is ok & what isn’t.

We’re all stronger together. & I hope someday I’m not still having this conversation with my children. I’m leaving this post with more questions than answers, but also with the hope that by starting a conversation, we’re heading in the right direction.

Ch-ch-changes (again)

de Boer Family Photo 2017

Just as we’ve settled into thinking we were going to be a bit more settled for a while, life decides to shake things up. A bit of background: N & I have spent the better part of our relationship doing some form of long distance.

Our relationship began a few months before my imminent cross-country move; we spent those first two years seeing each other infrequently, at best. When I moved back to Calgary, much of N’s work was based out of town, so he left for short periods fairly often. Then when he moved to his current company, we knew he’d be spending even more time out of town since most of their projects are on a rotation of some sort. We are no strangers to being apart.

In January, he found himself back in the Calgary office. We were preparing ourselves for an eventual out of town offer, as they don’t have as much work here right now. We’d discussed what we were willing to do, & what we weren’t, but then suddenly it seemed like he might be staying in town. You could say we were cautiously optimistic.

One Thursday a couple weeks ago, his boss approached him about moving to San Francisco. It was one of the options we’d known was a possibility, so we weren’t taken totally off guard, but we were surprised to find that it was back on the table so suddenly. We were told that with the current political situation in the States, it would take a little longer than the usual month for N to get his visa. Coupled with him needing to renew his passport, we figured we had some time. Turns out, we don’t, & he’s already preparing to leave this month.

So, here we go again with this long distance thing. N is moving down to San Francisco, (on a sort of three week rotation, keeping his Canadian salary, benefits, etc) while I stay here in Calgary. There were a lot of factors that went into this particular decision, & it’s hard to know if it’s the right one. One of the big ones was I wasn’t sure I was ready to be jobless in the US. It’s easy to imagine it would be fun to go down & freelance or blog or volunteer, but I think it’s harder to actually do it, & be without any kind of real income.

It’s certainly going to be an interesting adventure. N gets weekends off during the 3 weeks he’s down there, so he’ll get lots of time to explore the Bay Area & San Francisco. That part makes it a bit of a cool opportunity. Neither of us have ever been to the area, so we’re making plans to spend some time there together too. We’ve also got some Europe plans to look forward to. Overall, we’re optimistic that we can make the best of it & it’s only temporary. It’s a lot easier when we know it’s temporary.

Have you ever done long distance? Do you have any tips for us for living in the Bay Area? We’d love to hear them, if you do!

At Thirty

Calgary

You know, I’ve never been the type to stress over age milestones. I can’t deny I’m quite blessed with good genes & easily pass for younger than I am. That said, there’s something different about turning thirty. I never stressed about leaving my teens & my twenty fifth birthday was a non-event. I celebrated each in stride & moved on with my life & goals.

But three – oh; She’s been a different beast.

Thirtieth Birthday

I didn’t initially feel anything for this birthday. I was relatively calm, telling myself it was just another year. Subconsciously there was a shift though. It had nothing to do with the number, but seemed to have more to do with my internal clock. & honestly it didn’t happen when the calendar switched to July 24, 2015. Things have shifted gradually as the year’s progressed. If you haven’t caught on at this point, I’m talking about the idea of starting a family.

I’m not saying this year has changed my outlook. I still have many pre-parent plans in the making. I’m just saying it’s weird. It’s unexpected & foreign & I’m not sure how to deal with it. My plan is to take things as they come. I guess in a way I’m suppressing some things until I feel more ready. & I’m a planner, so the idea of deviating from my plan is rarely something I find appealing.

As much as I find that’s an odd thing to do, I take comfort in the idea that I suspect I’m not alone here. Life is different now than it was even thirty (hell, twenty)  years ago, & for me, that means a lot more planning. Luckily, I’m prone to that sort of thing to begin with.

I’m not sure how to end this post. It’s very personal to me, & something I’ve given a lot of thought to. The idea that I may be labelled high risk by the time I decide to procreate has always bothered me (I still believe that my thirty may be someone’s twenty five), but there’s something to be said for this biological clock idea. Something more than social cues.

I’ve told myself that I’m sure of my current decisions. That I’m fine with the outcome, either way. But am I? Or is my body prompting me to consider other options?

I don’t think there’s a real answer here, but it’s something I wanted to share.  Part of me misses this aspect of regular journal days – it forced me to talk about something outside my comfort zone. I’m not looking for someone to change my views on the subject. I simply hope that maybe someone else feels the same way, & I wanted to put this out there.  To say it’s ok. To be unsure, to question things, & maybe even share those uncomfortable feelings with others sometimes.

That’s it. That is how I truly feel. Today. (At Thirty).

Journal Day \ Thirteen

This week, write a “State of Me” address. Write about how you’re really doing- what you’ve been thinking, what you’ve been up to. What have you accomplished lately? Where is there room for growth? Where are you right now in life and where are you headed? Current joys, currents sadness…write it all out. Discuss the current state of YOU. 


I had really good intentions to write this post a few days ago…& then I kind of just let it slide. That says a bit about the state of me lately, I suppose. I try to shy away from responding with “busy” when asked how things are. I am a generally busy person (& I like it that way), but so is everyone else. & although I think it’s a cop out response, I am guilty of responding with it. Maybe that’s why I dislike it. Whatever. Let’s get back to the point.

I’m usually busy doing things I like &, more than likely, so are you. Currently, life feels particularly hectic. On top of wedding planning, I’m trying to get back into consistent workouts (I have unlimited CrossFit for the next month! Yes!), eating well, & maintaining some kind of social life. I slacked off a bit over the last couple months, so now that I’m getting back into some more healthy habits, it feels like a big undertaking. I’m sure things will level out in some ways, but we’ve also got a ton of plans for this entire summer. Between our wedding, wedding-related events, Stampede, & visits from friends, we are booked solid. I’m excited, albeit a little apprehensive.

We’re also full steam ahead with our honeymoon plans. Of course, by we, I mostly mean myself. Planning is totally my jam. I consult with N on any decisions, but the research is mostly me. I love it, but I definitely find myself getting lost in the internet sometimes. Hours can go by without my even realizing. I’m definitely one of those people who likes to weigh all the options before settling on one. Thankfully, the trip is 75% planned & booked, so there’s not a lot left to do except be excited!

This summer, I’ll need to learn to say no sometimes. As is, we have a lot planned & as much as I love going for drinks with our friends or enjoying a night out, I think I’m going to have to scale that back. I’m making CrossFit a priority this month, but I’m also trying not to spend every night in the gym. This box offers a few morning classes as well as lunch ones, so I’m going to try to take advantage of those when I can. It’s nice getting a workout in before the day starts.

We’re in an interesting place right now. Our wedding is less than two months away, which is a big symbolic change in who we are. We’ll see what other kind of changes it brings. September will certainly free up a lot of time for other endeavors, though. I’m looking forward to having the time to seriously look at houses, as one of our goals is to become homeowners. This crazy market should  make that an interesting challenge. Overall, we’re moving forward. In a lot of ways we know what we want, but we’ve also still got a lot of figuring out to do.

As for the state of me, personally? I’d say I’m pretty darn happy right now. There are so many things I’m excited for, not only in the next few months, but in the years to come as well. It’s the last year of my twenties & I plan to make it great. Things are never perfect – it really is the overall journey that puts this into perspective. (I know talking about the journey is so cliche. Bear with me.) There are always going to be highs & lows, but I can honestly say that it’s all generally good.  & for that I am incredibly grateful.

This post is in response to Danielle’s prompt on her blog, Sometimes Sweet. Find the rest of my responses in this series here.

Journal Day \ twelve

Let’s talk about love. Do you believe in the idea of a soulmate? Do you think there is one person for everyone- and do you think that no matter what, if you’re “supposed” to meet that person you will? This week, talk about your experience with love and discuss what you believe, and also be sure to touch on what helped shape those beliefs.

Photo by 3haus Photographics

The idea of a soulmate is both beautiful & tragic to me. On the one hand, the notion that you could find that one person, the yin to your yang, is quite lovely. That is, if you find that person & manage to hold on to them. Life likes to throw a wrench in beautiful, well thought out plans & losing your soulmate (or worse even , never finding them) is cruel if you only get the one. I like to believe that life isn’t quite that cruel.

By the same token, I do believe that N is the right person for me & I can’t imagine feeling this way about someone else (for the skeptics out there – yeah, I know everyone says that about their current relationship. Maybe we’re not all wrong?). Maybe it’s more of a choice. I don’t think I know the answer, & in all honesty, I’m not really sure I care to know.

What I do know for certain is that I love N. Sometimes that love is crazy & inexplicable. Sometimes it’s beautiful & unwavering. Sometimes I can’t keep it to myself while other times, it sits subtly under the surface. It’s in the every day as much as in those special moments, in the good as much as the bad. So whether I chose N or he chose me or it came from somewhere else entirely is irrelevant to me. I’ve chosen to be present in this relationship & in this love & to work at making it the best it can be.

These things are important to me – the working & being present. We recently met with our officiant & one comment he made really stuck with me because I’ve thought the same for a long time. We were talking about some of the significance behind different rituals at weddings & he said that like life, love has it’s ups & downs. It’s like a wave. Things will never stay tough for ever.

So while I do have many romantic (perhaps, naive) notions about love, I hope I keep these things in mind as we continue to grow & evolve together. Our relationship is still young (5 years, this Saturday. Happy Anniversary, N!), but I hope we continue to choose this love, soulmates or not.

I’ll leave you with my favourite quote about love:

On ne voit bien qu’avec le coeur. L’essentiel est invisible pour les yeux.” (Antoine de St Exupery)

I’ve translated this as: “It is only with the heart that one can see clearly. What is essential is invisible to the eye.

This post is in response to Danielle’s prompt on her blog, Sometimes Sweet. Find the rest of my responses in this series here.

 

Journal Day \ eleven

Sometimes it can be hard to hear criticism from others. I know for me it’s something I may always struggle with- being a people pleaser, etc. At the same time though, constructive criticism can be very helpful, and allow us to look at ourselves in a new light and maybe even grow and change. Take a step out of yourself. If you were on the outside looking in, how would you critique yourself? What things do you see that could change or work on? This isn’t about tearing ourselves down; it’s about really looking at ourselves and seeing where there’s room for growth.


I think I’m a bit of a people pleaser myself, so hearing criticism isn’t something I’m a huge fan of either. I know that it has it’s place, but I truly hate to disappoint people. While I thought sharing what I was good at was hard, it’s just as difficult to put my shortcomings out there, despite it being easier to think of areas where I fall short. These last two prompts are more alike than different in some ways.

The very first criticism that comes to mind will probably sound positive at first: I have pretty high expectations of myself. That’s a good thing, right? Mostly, it really is a good thing. I think it’s part of the reason I have the ability to motivate myself as well as others. But I also wind up feeling guilty about silly things – like buying my lunch or sleeping in. What weird things to feel guilty about! But I often do –  I should have gotten a better start on the day; I should have packed a lunch. Shoulda. Coulda. Woulda.  
This then translates to my expectations of others. I expect a lot from people – in group projects, at work, in my friendships. The problem with this is that my expectations aren’t always realistic. Furthermore, they may not even align with that person’s priorities. Can I really expect people to have the same priorities as I do? Regardless, they fall short in my mind & that’s not really fair. I’ve been working on going easier on myself & trying not to feel guilty about the little things, but it’s definitely something I continue to need to work on. 
Another big one is that I can be pretty opinionated. Again, this can be a good thing. I’m really passionate about a lot of things &, chances are, I just want you to understand why I think x is “the most amazing thing everrrr.” This also lands me in some trouble sometimes. Not everything is black & white & everyone is entitled to their opinion. I know this, but I’ll still probably argue with you & get a little intense about it.

Since I’m posting this almost a week late, I’m going to leave it at those two things. How about you? What things do you see that you could change or work on?

This post is in response to Danielle’s prompt on her blog, Sometimes Sweet. Find the rest of my responses in this series here.

Journal day \ ten

Quite simply, what are you good at? All of us have particular strengths- what are yours? This week, talk about these talents, big or small. Ideas: discuss how you use these things in your daily life or job, how you discovered a knack for this or that, perhaps even touch on whether or not you are passionate about the things you’re good at.

Photo credit to KG

The first thing that came to mind when I saw this prompt this week was swimming. I am undeniably better than the average person at swimming. For a long time I used that as an excuse for why I wasn’t great at other sports. Swimmers have a reputation for being awkward outside of the water. While this isn’t exactly true, I fell back on it from time to time. & it’s nice to have something that you know, without a shadow of a doubt, that you’re good at, especially when you’re younger. (It probably sounds weird coming from someone who runs half marathons & organizes Fitness Friday at work, but I’ve never considered myself very good at other sports. I don’t think I’m bad at them – I just don’t think I’m really good at them either. I do them because I enjoy being outside & I’m extremely competitive.)

I find it hard to talk about my strengths. While weaknesses easily spring to mind, I still have to really think about the things that I’m good at. I think it’s just human nature to be critical of ourselves so this is definitely a good exercise. I am good at things other than swimming. I’ve had people tell me that I’m good at motivating others & that I give good fashion advice. While I probably wouldn’t say these are skills I possess on my own, I am flattered to hear that. Those are things I’m happy to be good at, if in fact I am. 
Let’s talk about what I think I’m good at though. Even as I type this I’m struggling to actually list my strengths. I don’t entirely know why, but in the back of my mind I can’t help but wonder what people will think. Will they agree? Will they disagree? Most importantly, why do I care? Here goes…
I am good at writing. This is something I question often. Having a blog forces me to focus on writing more, but that doesn’t always mean I’m happy with the results. Usually I just need a little distance to come around to it, but it can definitely be difficult to put your words out there on the internet for all to see. But I am a good writer. A large part of my job involves writing & I know that what I put out is well done. 
I am good at research. This may sound like a weird thing to say, but I can actually confidently say that I’m good at this. I am great at asking the google the right questions. I think this partially transfers over to being good at problem solving. Having worked in Customer Service for ten years, this skill is a huge asset. It also transfers over to little everyday things like finding out new recipes or looking up new restaurants. I’ve got all that under control. Me & the google, we get along real well. 
I am good at planning. This is kind of cheat since it goes hand in hand with research, but I’m a planner. I love planning trips & making sure I include everything I want to see & do. I’m good at making a meal plan every week so that we know what to shop for & what we’re eating every night. I’m a little bit Type A there, as my manager pointed out last night. I love to be organized. 
I am good at making people laugh. Sometimes it’s at me, sometimes it’s with me, & sometimes I’m actually funny. I think. Either way, people tend to laugh when I’m around. 
I am a good cook. I haven’t always been the best cook, but I’ve definitely learned & gotten better as time goes on. I like to experiment & try new recipes so I definitely think that’s been the key for me. 
I’m a good teacher. I coached swimming & then taught lessons for a long time & I genuinely think I’m good at this. It’s funny because I can’t picture myself teaching in a school. I think I was good at teaching swimming because I’m a good swimmer & I love it. Teaching something you love is so rewarding.
I’m a good friend. I’m good a keeping in touch & making people a priority. If you’re important to me, you’re probably stuck with me unless you try really hard to escape. 
I’m sure there are other things I could come up with, but this is feeling like a really long list. I feel a bit full of myself, so we’ll stop here.

Do you find it hard to talk about your strengths? Try it out in the comments below. I’d love to hear what you’re good at! 

This post is in response to Danielle’s prompt on her blog, Sometimes Sweet. Find the rest of my responses in this series here.

Journal Day \ nine

How would you say your upbringing or background has shaped your idea of beauty? Were you taught to apply makeup or do you hair by your mother or friends? If not, where did you observe what is now your norm as far as beauty practices? And although most of us have been inundated by different cultural beauty “norms” via the media, would you say that television and magazines have had a strong impact on shaping what you think of as beautiful? This week, write about your idea of beauty- how your background has shaped it and what that means for you today.

Your upbringing certainly shapes much of how you view the world – your perception of beauty included. My family was mostly blessed with good genes & my mother has never needed to wear much makeup. I remember her always looking very put together, a feat she continues to achieve to this day. That didn’t necessarily mean a lot of makeup but it did mean dressing well & taking care in her appearance. She always told me it’s better to be too dressed up than to be too casual – & that’s something I find myself believing now, as an adult.

I was not allowed to wear makeup until midway through Junior High. Even as my peers began experimenting with makeup, I did not. I think I first wore a little makeup in the eight grade. In fact, I saw my grade eight photo recently & I am definitely wearing a terrible shade of brown lipstick (why was brown lipstick ever in? It looked terrible.). I swam throughout Junior High & High School so makeup never became a huge priority. I did sometimes take the time on my days off or if I was going to a party or dance, but it was never a daily ritual. 
Even once I hit University, it didn’t become a priority. I taught swimming lessons as of third year & often couldn’t be bothered to put makeup on if it meant I was going to jump in the water later that day. I spent more time on my hair & makeup as I started going out to clubs & bars with friends. My girlfriends & I would turn on music & have a few drinks together as we got ready for the night. I think that’s a fairly natural evolution for girls my age. 
In my last few years of University & in the year following graduation, I worked at Starbucks. My shifts often began before the sun came up & I prioritized sleep over makeup. I was not & will likely never be a morning person, despite my penchant for taking early shifts (I’d rather have my evenings free.).
Now that I work in an office, I spend a lot more time on my appearance. I basically went from spending no time to a little time. Living in Montreal & France shaped my clothing choices too. Both place more importance than Calgary on dressing well & that has translated into my life now. I actually like dressing up a bit for work. I love heels & I love nice clothes, especially silk dresses and shirts. So it always feels fun. I also wear more makeup than I used to. I still wouldn’t say that I wear a ton & I’m not afraid to go without, but I like playing with a bit of eyeliner & find false lashes to be a fun addition to a special event. I’ve gotten into the habit of curling my hair every day & that’s definitely something I’d like to try to break a bit. Especially in the summer, it’s good to let it do whatever from time to time.

I like to think that I don’t look to magazines & the media for examples of beauty, but I think that would be a lie. To a certain extent, there’s always a bit of influence from them. With the fairly recent addition of CrossFit to my life, I’ve gone back to how I used to think of beauty in high school a bit more – strong, fit, & confident are some of the most beautiful qualities a woman can have. I’d still like to get to a better place in terms of confidence in my appearance. I think that’s something that most women unfortunately struggle with to some degree. 
It’s funny to think that my idea of beauty evolved over the years to wind up right back where it started. I love the idea of finding beauty in strength. I’ll never have tiny little toothpick arms but these arms of mine do a lot of awesome things. I’m learning to love that. 

This post is in response to Danielle’s prompt on her blog, Sometimes Sweet. Find the rest of my responses in this series here.

Journal Day \ eight

Would you consider yourself a religious person? Quite simply- what do you believe happens when you die? Have you always believed this? Do your current beliefs align with what you were taught as a child? And if not, what was the turning point? This week, talk about your religion or spiritual beliefs (or perhaps your lack of), and try to sum up, if you can, what you believe happens “next.”

Religion. Oh boy. I wasn’t going to post a response when I first saw this prompt. I’m always a little bit hesitant to discuss religion with anyone. While I’m not generally shy about my opinions, this is something I try to think twice about before offering my thoughts. Danielle posted this morning though & her response inspired me to write something. I’ve posted a Journal Day response every week so far & I think it’s silly to censor myself in regards to this. I know not everyone will agree with what I have to say. So as Danielle did, I will just preface this post with this disclaimer: I don’t mean to question your beliefs or lack thereof. Please do not take offense to what I have to say here – I don’t want to judge you & I hope you won’t pass judgement on me either.

Religion is an incredibly interesting topic. I can’t think of many other topics with so many different variations of belief (or disbelief). There is so much emotion tied to this topic that it’s a little intimidating to put my thoughts out there, but here goes…
I do not consider myself to be a religious person, at least not in the sense of organized religion. This idea does not come from a place of disrespect or rebellion. This is something I’ve come to realize in the last 10 years. I don’t have a problem with other people believing or not believing – I think as long as we are respectful of each other & of others’ beliefs, we’re on the right track. 
We grew up with some knowledge of the Anglican faith. As a baby, I was baptized in a beautiful Anglican Cathedral, the same one in which my parents were married & my brother would later be baptized. We attended church around both of those events, but as we got older services took a backseat to swim meets & soccer practices. I was never opposed to church as a child, but I was also happy to sleep in or play sports. It wasn’t a priority for me. 
I had many friends of different faiths & backgrounds throughout school. I attended public school in a province that offers a non-private catholic school option so most of my religious peers were either Christian or Jewish. For the most part, we didn’t discuss or think about religion much. The public school system is meant to welcome any & all religions. There was one exception at the end of High School. As I spent more time with a Mormon family, I did think of religion more. Although I never really discussed my own beliefs with them, their discussions with me about their beliefs caused me to focus a little more on the topic. I think that’s when I came to the conclusion that, although I had never identified with my atheist peers, I didn’t identify with organized religion. I was somewhere in the middle of things (oddly enough, this seems to be where I fall on the political spectrum too…)
You hear this often from non-believers: I like science. Or I like facts. & I can identify with those statements. In order to believe, you have to have faith in the unknown &, while there are some things in which I trust completely, a higher power isn’t necessarily one of them. Now, I’m not saying I don’t believe in a higher power at all. I’m just also not saying I do believe. I don’t know if there is, but it’s not something I generally occupy my time thinking about. I’d rather just be. & be present. 
Sometimes I think it’s easier to believe in something then to wrap your mind around nothingness. Having faith in a world after death is comforting. It means there’s more to life than just what’s going on here & now. It means that life doesn’t just end when you die. It means good people will go to a good place together. (Or maybe it means something different to you. That’s ok too.) I just don’t know if I genuinely believe that. I’m not going to write it off, but I’m not going to spend a lot of time thinking about it either (beyond the thinking I’ve already done, I suppose). For me, either possibility is valid – something might happen next or it might not. 
The point is that I don’t know the answer to what happens next. I don’t think anyone does. & instead of worrying about it, I’m going to do my best to enjoy my time in this world. I hope you can respect that, whether you agree with me or not. 
This post is in response to Danielle’s prompt on her blog, Sometimes Sweet. Find the rest of my responses in this series here

Journal Day \ seven

Do you use social media in your daily life? Do you think it adds to your relationships with others, or takes away from them? And furthermore, do you think social media adds more positive or negative to your life? Write about your relationship with social media, and talk a bit about how you got started, and what role it plays in your world.

Oh, social media. I feel like this topic comes up often in conversation. I use many different forms of it often: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter. I was one of the first of my friends to get a Facebook account, after the American friends I met in France insisted I join so we could easily keep in touch. I think I jumped on the Twitter bandwagon in 2008 & I joined Instagram a few year later when I finally got an iPhone. 

I have to say that I absolutely love Instagram. I love the communities & challenges I’ve been exposed to because of it & I love following friends & making new ones. It’s fun catching a glimpse into people’s lives & I enjoy capturing little moments of mine that I might otherwise overlook. I enjoy Twitter for the same reasons, in addition to being able to follow news & other forums. 
I do think it can be a double-edged sword though. I’ve found myself opening Instagram without even realizing I’m doing it. I usually try to take a break & put my phone away when that happens, but it’s remarkably easy to get caught up. N & I have had a few spats over our phone usage. I don’t like when he plays games on his all the time & he doesn’t always like when I’m on Instagram. In that regard, it doesn’t add to my relationship. 
I think in a lot of other ways it can add to relationships though. I’ve inspired and been inspired by fitness friends & challenges, found great new recipes, & kept up with relationships I may not have otherwise. I don’t use Facebook much anymore aside from posting photos, blog posts, or creating events, but I do find it really useful for those purposes, as well as for keeping in touch with friends overseas. It keeps things organized & I like that aspect of it. 
Going forward, I’d like to get better at putting my phone away & shutting off social media from time to time. I’d also like to learn to be more effective when I do use it. I think it can be a great tool when used properly & in moderation. (Ha! Everything in moderation, right?
This post is in response to Danielle’s prompt on her blog, Sometimes Sweet. Find the rest of my responses in this series here

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